For my male peers reading this, do you think the sexual assault allegations against Bryan Callen are most likely true?
Or do you find yourself questioning the accuser? Maybe she has an alterior motive?
I brought this up in a mostly female room on Clubhouse yesterday, and overwhelmingly received the most negative response I've had in my life.
But I gained an important perspective all men can learn from in the process...
Who should we believe?
That's the question. Your answer actually defines your current belief system.
If you believe the accused assaulter did it... you're probably right.
If you, similar to me before this experience, believe the accuser may have an alterior motive, I want to explain what I learned and why it changed my thinking on sexual misconduct allegations going forward.
He most likely did it.
Why are we afraid?
I think many of us are afraid of the current state of the internet. You can be accused of anything. Who knows what to believe anymore?
I have followed Bryan Callen for a while now. He was never my favorite comedian, but I thought he was okay. For some reason, I found myself coming to his side when I heard the news break out.
All I had saw at that point was the headline. I've never been aggressive with women, so assumed the same for him too and gave him the benefit of the doubt.
I mean, maybe he broke up with her years ago and she's still upset about it. Who knows?
There's also a certain anger prevelent in cancel culture that I linked to this situation too.
But they're not the same, and there are very good reasons why it's unlikely she'd make it up.
What made me change my mind?
The feedback I received from a mostly female crowd was that I should consider why I naturally assumed the accuser might be lying.
I learned about the many negative consequences to coming forth with rape allegations, making it extremely likely women are telling the truth.
On the other side, men who are sexually aggressive are likely to have a pattern of it, and lie about it after too. They think differently than us "normal" guys who treat women well.
When I read the LA Times article on Callen afterward (yes, I definitely should have read it before bringing it up in public conversation), I realized it's pretty obvious he has a pattern of sexually aggressive and not-okay behavior.
I didn't want to believe it, but between reading the personal accounts in the article, watching his IG response (seeing some body language that he was lying), and that conversation... I came to the conclusion that it's more likely he did it.
Even though I'm afraid of reputation-destroying attacks being made these days without due process, I encourage my male peers out there to appreciate the female perspective of this issue.
Sexual assault is still widespread.
What was your initial reaction when you heard about the Bryan Callen allegations? Do you naturally assume sexual assault accusations are true or false?
Please share if you feel like more people need to hear this.
Millennials, I hate to break it to you but you're no longer cool.
According to Gen Z that is...
In this article, I'll be investigating if what Zoomers are saying is right. Are Millennials actually the next Boomers?
Boomers of course being a generation that built a lot but also damaged pretty much everything in the world.
Millennials have been talking about that for quite a while now, and as a Millennial myself, I have the perspective that we played a big part in starting to bring awareness to a lot of issues, such as sustainability and happiness.
Happiness is a very important aspect of our lives and what we're seeking in the Millennial generation.
In fact, remember there was even a song called Pursuit of Happiness by Kid Cudi? That proves it.
But Gen Z takes a different view on these things. In fact, a recent report asked: "Which is most important to Gen Z... financial stability or doing something you enjoy?"
Surprisingly, 66% of Gen Z respondants said they would prefer financial stability!
This is quite the opposite from Millennials, and it's just one of many ways that Gen Z difference from us. We really need to start understanding this.
Most people right now have a tendency to bucket both into one group.
But what we're starting to see is that Gen Z has so many differences from Millennials that we really need to start over from scratch in how we understand them.
What's concerning to me is that I notice Millennials talk about caring about the environment and all these other issues that we've been bringing up for a while now, but in the end, we have a tendency to make the easy choice still.
...a very, very Boomer trait unfortunately.
Gen Z is the complete opposite.
Zoomers are actively in the streets rioting for change right now, so if you want a demonstration of what they're capable of achieving - there you go. They're capable of tremendous change.
Zoomers look at Millennials as kind of the "kids with promise who never did anything about it."
In some ways, I think Millennials are succumbing to the hardships of living now through two recessions. We're entering one now that's going to be even bigger than the last one, and a lot of people are tired.
*takes a meditation break*
I want to be the first one to say to all my Millennials out there that you still have a chance to achieve your dreams.
And in fact, you have a better chance now than ever because you bring the wisdom of all your 20s with you. That's certainly been my experience with the businesses I'm starting now.
It was so much harder starting a business back in my 20s. I found that 90% of my time was wasted.
So even though in your 20s you do have a lot more energy than in your 30s, if you just account for the fact that you're going to avoid 90% of the time that would have been wasted, you can see that you actually come out on top.
So that's my message to Millennials: don't be a Boomer. Start to find your second breath, and on top of that, look for ways to follow through on some of the promises our generation set out to make.
One way to do that is to really start listening to Zoomers, and team up with them. Partner with them in any way you can.
If you're in business, start to employ them. I know that's rather hard for some of you out there right now since we're entering a Great Depression, but for those of you who can do it, please do because it'll put you ahead.
Plus it'll help you stay on top of all the latest dank memes and TikTok dances!
Millennials, now is the time to make a decision. Are we going to let our generation fall back into the patters that we've been complaining about for more than a decade?
Or are we going to look to the Zoomers, and the energy that they're bringing right now, and use that to inspire us to actually create the change that we want to see in the world?
I know my answer. I want to see that change.
And I hope you do too. In fact, if you've been reading this long I can't image it would be otherswise.
If you found this article inspiring or thought-provoking, please share it on Facebook because, you know, we're Millennials and we still use it!
And finally, let me know down in the comments what you think.
Recently cited by Fox Business News as a leader they're watching, I'm the co-founder of Yumwoof, a daily meditator and recently writing about modern sociology.